Alice & Emmett's Battles
by ShortPixie1998
Summary: Well, the title says it all, really. Alice and Emmett go head-to-head playing Black Ops, and well, things don't turn out so well. Enjoy!
1. Smashing the TV

I sat with my family in the TV room. I looked around and saw Carlisle and Esme having an animated discussion about Renesmee and what to get her for Christmas. Alice was cuddling with Jasper in the corner of the couch, her laptop open, and credit cards at hand. I chuckled. Edward, Bella, Renesmee, and Jacob were talking about Christmas as well. Bella sighed and got up as Jacob suggested that Nessie spend Christmas down at the Reservation. Rosalie rolled her eyes and continued reading her fashion magazine. I focused more on Black Ops.

"Please die, you filthy little-!" Carlisle, Esme, Edward, and Bella looked at me hard, cutting me off. I smiled innocently. "Sorry. Damn things won't die."

Alice giggled. "Let me try." She hopped up and plopped down next to me leaving Jasper looking bewildered.

"Darlin', you and Black Ops just don't mix… You'll lose then smash the TV like last time." Jasper laughed gently at the memory.

"No I won't," she argued. "That was… last week. I'll be okay, Jazz."

Jasper swallowed and nodded. He glanced at Carlisle who looked just as scared as he did.

I handed Alice a controller and grinned. "You're on, Lissy."

Alice flexed and smirked. "I can beat you in a second, bro."

I pressed play and started killing things. Alice stared blankly into the TV trying to figure out what to do. She snapped out of it and started to shoot everywhere. In about two minutes, she was dead.

"No!" she screamed. "No, no, no, no!" Alice stood up and threw the controller at the TV. "Carlisle, Emmett killed me!"

Jasper, Jacob, Edward and I laughed hard as Alice threw a temper-tantrum. Her temper-tantrums were always crazy. When Carlisle put a limit on her credit cards, she went hunting, and didn't come back for a week. When she did come back, she was covered in animal blood and wood. We went hunting the next day and some of the trees were demolished.

Carlisle, Esme, Bella, and Rosalie just looked freaked out. Although it's not unusual for Alice to have a temper-tantrum when she doesn't get her way, it's still scary as hell.

"Alice, my dear," Carlisle said, softly putting his hands on her shoulders. "It's just a game."

That's when things really got hot. I stood up and defended Alice.

"Just a game, oh, it isn't just a game!" I yelled. Alice backed away with wide eyes. We all know what happens when I have _my _tantrums.

"That is enough. You and your sister are being childish." Carlisle scolded.

"B…b…but." Alice whimpered.

Carlisle bought into her puppy-dog face and hugged her. "It's okay. We'll buy a new TV."

Esme sighed and grabbed her purse. "Let's go, Emmett. Alice." She nodded.

Alice looked up from Carlisle's chest quickly. "Shopping?"

Esme looked scared. "Yes." She looked quickly at Rosalie who shook her head.

Alice, Esme, and I got in the Jeep and went to the mall. Personally, I don't like the mall, but it makes Alice happy. Don't tell anyone, but she's secretly my favorite. Bella whines too much. Rosalie's just… Rosalie.

Once we got to the mall, I handed Alice my credit card (which has no limit what-so-ever) and set her loose. Esme went shopping for home appliances and I went to buy the family a huge, bad-ass TV.

Authors Note: Alright! How was that? *Grins* I hope y'all liked it. Reviews are always welcome. Look for more of my stories and enjoy them. Thanks for reading! *Smiles wide* -ShortPixie


	2. History of Shopping & Winning

Alice, Esme, and I were back from the mall. Alice had bought a crap load of clothes, Esme had bought way too many home appliances, and I, well, I got out new huge, bad-ass TV like I said I was going to get. Tomorrow, I plan on watching re-runs of _The Wiggles _and _Barney_, and then I will play Black Ops. Edward looked at me weird when I thought about this.

_What? _I thought. _Barney, the Wiggles, and Black Ops is fun, Edward._

"Um. Okay, Emmett. I'm glad you like it." Edward mumbled.

Carlisle and I set the TV up while Alice sat on the couch telling Jasper about everything she bought. I looked at my little sister and grinned. "Lissy, why do you like shopping so much?"

"Well, Emmett… Shopping is a fun… sport." Alice nodded. "It takes my mind off of things when I'm sad or angry." She shrugged and went on. "Shopping. Let's see. What can I tell you about shopping?"

"Alright, actually, I have something to attend to and I don't want to know." I said quickly.

"Sit. Down." She glared.

I nodded quickly and sat down. Alice climbed into my lap.

"Okay, dear brother, shopping is a great sport. You learn a lot of math. "

"Alice, how do you learn math…" I looked at the tiny, but full grown girl in my arms.

"Shush, Emmett. You learn math because you have to count money." She nodded and smiled. "You get to go from store to store buying things. It's really fun. See, when I shop, I just buy everything I like. Today I bought Gucci shoes, Dexter purses…" she went on telling me everything she bought as she told Jasper. I looked at him weakly.

Jasper burst out laughing. "I am so sorry you have to listen to this, man." He grinned and blurred out of the room and Alice continued with the History of Shopping.

"…then you have to take it to the counter and buy it…"

_This is going to be one hell of a night,_ I thought to myself.

She grinned at me. "I know what you're thinking." She gripped my arm. "You're going nowhere until I'm done, mister!"

"Carlisle, Alice is keeping me captive!" I yelled. I heard Carlisle and Edward laugh from Carlisle's study.

"They're no help to you. They're scared of me." She nodded.

"Alice, please. I don't need to know this stuff!" I argued.

"Fine…" she grabbed the controller for the second time today and grinned.

I smirked and turned the TV and XBOX on, grabbed a controller for myself, and sat back down. "You're on, Alice. You'll lose."

"Oh, screw you." She pressed play and started shooting me.

"Whoa, Alice, stop!" I yelled. I heard Jasper laugh hard from his study.

"Oh, yeah." Alice jumped up right as she killed me. "In your face!" she yelled.

I looked at her like she was crazy. "Did you really just do that?"

"Hell yeah! That's what you get when you mess with this pixie!" she laughed evilly and ran to Jasper's study. "Jazzy, I beat him! I finally beat him!"

Jasper laughed and mumbled, "that's good, darlin'."


End file.
